Meandering Thoughts...

I adore this picture.

This is when Ammon was a little over 1 year old and he ran off while I was changing his diaper and we had blocked the hallway with a chair, so he's standing at the chair, pointing to something. His butt is so cute.

I can say that, I created that butt.

Anyway, I just have to express how much I adore my boys. I've decided I'm a "Boy Mom".

Charles and I went to the movies on Saturday and I saw so many little girls dressed up all "princessy" and I thought, "dude, I'm so glad I don't have to do that with my boys..."

Ammon is a very touchy kid - because we held him all the time and then he had some horrible daycare experiences which made him clingy. So one of us has to lay him down in bed every night for him to go to sleep and Charles and I have talked about how much we enjoy it. It's so nice to breathe Ammon's essence. It's so nice to know that he trusts us. And it's wonderful to end the day with such a cute kid. Ammon has not only been our missionary, but he's our best friend. Sometimes when life's rough, we perservere only because of him.

He's so funny. He's so loving with Aaron. He's so intelligent and coordinated. I can't say enough about him. He exudes all the best qualities.

Aaron will look up to him and they'll be inseparable throughout their lives.

You know, I was thinking and I really feel that if we had pursued court with Jana, it would destroy our marriage. Jana has caused so much contention and stress that I think if it continued and escalated, I would be soooooo done and just walk away. I think the answer to not pursue the court stuff was more for our marriage than for any other reason.

I don't know what will happen. I just love my children and desire for them to have a beautiful home with a yard and a good upbringing and stable family-life.